Screaming Bean

New Years!

2009-12-31T13:45:00.003-05:00

With the momentous nature of a day like this, I thought I'd revisit my nearly derelict blog to say hello once more. I too have survived this year, and in a moment of reflection hope like hell that this next year brings much happiness and good things to everyone. While I can't say this decade was great, after all, I did get a A.A.S, B.A. and my J.D., after that it's been a bit downhill. The New Year brings with it a bunch of stuff. I get to go to a couple lawyer conventions, and pretend I'm a real live lawyer, even though most days I'm riding my couch and trying to stay warm. Everyone says that the 70's as a decade were bad. Now, I was born during that decade so it couldn't have been that bad, right? I'm thinking the 00's were my seventies. I need some disco and a big ol' sedan and we'll drive right into the 2010s. It'll be okay. I promise.

Where has the time gone...

2009-09-11T11:16:00.003-04:00

Yup, I'm alive. Not that there's anyone left to read this. But something told me to stop by today and update this long defunct blog. Sadly, I have no good news to share. I am still unemployed. I've added a bunch of committees and organizations to my resume, but nothing that has led to a real job. I read a quote the other day that some people seem to feel that they've been deceived by their career. I would have to say that I fall into that camp. Though, I have a hard time feeling like I was ever a lawyer. I had a job, but now it doesn't even seem like I ever used my license. I renew this December, but it nearly seems pointless. I'm still here. I have no job.

No gnus is new gnus...

2009-05-06T16:44:00.003-04:00

I realized today it was nearly 2 months since I last updated here. Things are about the same as I last left it. Still unemployed, but still enjoying life. I've gone to 3 CLEs, done some volunteer work I would not have had the chance to do, and done a bit of writing. The state is still paying me unemployment, which is the upside of the stimulus package. In a warped sort of way, it's the first time where I've actually gotten something back from paying in to the state. This is not to say that I'm not trying though. It seems almost goofy to say I'm an unemployed attorney. People seem to understand given the business I'm in, but it leaves most people scratching their heads. If nothing else, it gives new impact to the condition of the economy that even someone like me can lose a job. I'm not exactly a blue collar assembly plant worker. But anyway, I'd like to thank everyone for all the support I've gotten. This blog has given me a lot of support over the years. And I'll hang in here until there's an end to this story. I owe you all as much. Thanks!

Yup, me too.

2009-03-09T11:38:00.003-04:00

Well I didn't realize how prescient my last post was. Within a week of that posting, I too lost my job. As everything else at that job, even the layoff did not go well. Instead of just being forthright and saying that we have no work I'll have to let you go, it went down with me being called into the office and being forced to try and justify my continued existence at work. Within 30 seconds I could see what was going to happen and while justifying my work ethic and my commitment to the clients I worked with, I illuminated the issue that my boss seemed to take offense with me trying to serve the clients in a timely fashion. Unsurprisingly, it did not go well, though it was a stunner to hear that my boss did not appreciate efficiency or responsiveness. I knew I was done. I didn't go down without a fight. I insisted on a letter of reference and that I would not be fought on my unemployment benefits. To say I had thought this through before would be an understatement.

So now I spend my days being domestic, looking for jobs, and making dinner. My spouse thinks I'm in a better place now than I have been in 2 years. I would have to agree.

Where does the time go?

2009-02-23T10:14:00.002-05:00

Suffice it to say I didn't get the job. Lovely ding letter, but I came up short again. This has put me in a bit of a funk, so I haven't been blogging. Nothing good to say I suppose. Bit of Twitter, which is a huge timesink, and more Facebook nonsense, but nothing good in my professional career.

Today I try a different tack and go to a meeting this evening that may allow me to get more involved in the bar association even though it's not exactly supported here at the firm. I've got to do something since our work has nearly dried up. I fear for what the future holds for my job. Nothing of my own doing mind you, but when our attention has turned to having pointless meetings in the hope of drumming up non-existent work, it's not looking good. Blah.

Today is the first day of something good!

2009-02-03T14:40:00.002-05:00

I have an interview today! The firm is moving quickly, as I only put my resume in last Thursday. Heartening, most definitely. Scary, nearly as much. I've been practicing my questions, working on introducing myself so that I don't sound like an idiot, and trying not to get stuff on my suit at lunch. This would be the first interview I've had since I started working with my coach, so I hope this works. I have been paying attention in our meetings, but it's another thing all together to actually use the skills. Now, if I could only get my hands to warm up.

The Day After

2009-01-21T10:47:00.002-05:00

Like many of you, I sat transfixed yesterday watching the pageantry and historical significance of the inauguration. The speech was moving and angry at times, as was the crowd. When the chant of na-na-na-na goodbye went up from the crowd as the Bushes' helicopter passed overhead, you knew where the crowd stood politically. Still, to see nearly two million people in one spot for one singular purpose with no riots or incidents, that was as breathtaking as anything that took place on stage. I felt bad that Senator Kennedy overextended himself during the inaugural, causing his later health incident during the luncheon. I know he wouldn't have missed it for the world, but to sit for nearly two hours on the dais, it was a risk certainly. The thing that made me laugh though would have to be Al Roker's attempt to contact the president while he walked past him on the parade route. After hearing over the course of the morning that he'd been snubbed by every president to date, to actually have Obama make a direct statement that it was warm nearly made Al come unglued.

So I hear you can't write...

2009-01-16T10:41:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was my review. I'm still employed, so I guess that's a start. Our bonuses were pared back considerably, but since I got considerably less than everyone else last year, I didn't have that much to be pared. But of course, this all came at a cost. It seems I can't write. Or at least that was what I was told yesterday. Now mind you, my boss seems to think good sentence structure involves a paragraph-length sentence with serial commas. However, I do not write on the level of an attorney. I am supposed to take courses to that end in order to bring myself to his level of competency. I was dumbstruck to say the least. Especially when I was also told that my choice of vocabulary also is not at the level he expects. What do you say to that? Excuse me, just because I don't find your use of herein, therewith, and heretofore useful does not make me an incompetent. No, instead I just sat ramrod straight, teeth clenched, and did not as much as twitch. I tried to go to my happy place, but it didn't work. So now, not only do I hate my job more than before, I now doubt myself. I think that's far worse.

First of 2009!

2009-01-08T14:43:00.002-05:00

I came clean to my job coach today that I blog. I think he was concerned that this blog may be impinging my job prospects, but I said, "If they figure out who I am based on this blog, I give them a lot of credit." Now, don't anyone take this statement as a challenge. I'm happy in my pseudo status and have been for a good long time. I am continuing to work on my escape plan...otherwise known as job search. I do feel confident that the plan is working, it's just a matter of time. In the mean time, I keep my head down and await the next diatribe. Or even better, next week's review. I'm not holding out any hope that there will be any thing fun coming out of that...in fact, my bet is that there will be no bonuses, and the economy will be used as an excuse. Not that we're hurting for work, it's just convenient to screw us all out of money. Eh. We'll see. In the meantime, hope the new year is going well for you and that you're writing 2009 on your important papers. I keep getting screwed up by Excel when trying to put in last years dates. But I'm a lawyer, not a data entry operator.

Happy New Year!

2008-12-31T10:22:00.002-05:00

The best thing about a new year is that it's a new start. The calendar flips over and the new year is full of possibilities. I wanted to drop a quick line to all my bloggie friends and wish them a fantastic 2009, and may all the new possibilities that are just waiting to be grasped be made aware to you. Things will be better, just wait and see!

Happy Birthday to me!

2008-12-17T12:57:00.004-05:00

Yes, indeed Beanie is one whole year older. Wiser? Not necessarily, I'm still working at the same job. In fact, tomorrow is my 2nd anniversary here in hell. Makes me feel like my 33rd year on Earth was a bit of a downer. But on the bright side, I'm healthy, loved, and live in a lovely home. Can I really hope for much more? So here's to 34. Here's hoping things are on the upswing and we're on to bigger better things!

Wow, I haven't written in that long?

2008-12-04T12:27:00.004-05:00

I'm so bad about keeping up with the blog these days. I'm on Facebook a lot, and honestly it's much easier to dash off a one sentence status than pouring out my soul here. Though, the blog is much more cathartic. And it always has been, which is why I started it in the first place. Nothing new on the job front, though in this economy, am I not surprised? I'm trying to work the networking, with two events in the next two weeks. However, for me, networking is like dental work. I don't want to go, and then when I'm there I just do the wallflower-sipping-a-drink thing. I'm not a bon vivant by any stretch of the imagination. This has got to change, and tonight it starts. Though just the thought of going tonight fills me with dread. I'm so lame.

Bad bad blogger I am...

2008-11-24T10:56:00.002-05:00

I know as I get older I stop blogging as much...heh. Actually I don't blog as much any more mostly because each of my blog posts are a whine fest. Yeah, work sucks. Yeah, I'm trying to do something about it. Of course, I couldn't have picked a worse time in the economy to try and do this. At least I have a job. Either way, I just keep on keeping on, and hope for something good to happen, and work towards that end. In the meantime, it's my favorite holiday of the year this week...Thanksgiving! Of course, I haven't bought a turkey yet, but I have some potatoes and the beginnings of some stuffing. And gravy....gotta have gravy.

Oh why am I here?

2008-11-11T17:31:00.002-05:00

Everyday for the last week or so, I've asked why I am here. Here, being work. Like today for instance. It's Veterans Day. (Thank you veterans!) Me, I'm at work. Why? I have no clue. With banks closed, none of my deals can close. No fed, no wires. So instead, I sat around doing personal tasks in order to keep myself from going slowly insane. I straightened out a medical bill. I networked with two fellow attorneys via e-mail. I applied to four firms. I read a book. I stood and stared out the window a while. Now mind you, our boss is AWOL for most of this. And therein lies the problem. We are all dodging the boss these days. The boss has gone wackier than in prior months. Won't work on any of our trades, putting us in perpetual hold, making all sorts of insane requests, been moodier than...I can't even come up with the rest of that phrase. That's how bad it's been. Billables have been non-existent. And I'm sure I'll catch the brunt of that later, but in the mean time, no one wants to approach the boss to find out what the hell is going on. And I plain refuse to beg to make people do their work. It's not my job. Especially when that person is the boss.

Hope Springs Eternal

2008-11-05T15:08:00.002-05:00

Like most of my fellow Americans, I too was glued to my television last night, along with my computer, keeping tabs on all the election coverage. When I heard about the issues with the ballots in Palm Beach county I started ranting...that we should just force the state to secede, whether they wanted to or not. If it were possible to make the butterfly ballot even more complicated, they succeeded. Luckily, it didn't come down to the Sunshine State. We cheered Pennsylvania, we cheered Ohio, and we cheered Colorado. McCain's concession speech was the best speech I've ever heard him give, even if his crowd couldn't be gracious in defeat. Obama's speech gave me goosebumps. While I sat in bed listening I marveled at how well-spoken and compelling a speaker he is. I know for a lot of people the speech is just considered lip service, but for me it made me think that hey, maybe the light at the end of this tunnel isn't a train after all. Still, I wouldn't want to be in his shoes, this is quite the mess to try and clean up.

It's Election Day!

2008-11-04T11:59:00.003-05:00

I'm sure you've already heard a million pleas to go out and vote today, but here's one more. Stand in line, as long as it takes, and vote! Maybe if you're lucky you'll get a sticker. We never get stickers. Then go and get your free ice cream, coffee, and donut! It's the tasty way to celebrate democracy. I'm still a big believer that today should be a national holiday. We all should be able to celebrate Election Day! I heard over the weekend that 95% of people polled believe that voting is a patriotic act. So be patriotic. No flag pins required. Today we make history!

Happy Halloween!

2008-10-31T09:49:00.003-04:00

Happy Halloween everyone! I know I sound like such a spoilsport when I say this, but I wish it would rain or something tonight, because it's a Friday Halloween. This means bad things in my neighborhood. Gangs of roving teenagers doing all sorts of vandalism to our homes, and because it's Friday and good weather, nothing at all to make them go home. As it is, the cops have to patrol around us in mass. We are ground zero for our area for Halloween. And not in a good way. It really takes the fun out of it. At least our cars can be in the garage and we can hunker down, but it's like preparing for war. So here's hoping your Halloween is carefree, full of chocolate-y goodness and lots of cute little kids in costumes.

My car loves me...

2008-10-28T14:42:00.003-04:00

My car is not old. My car only has 16,000 miles on it. However, the other day I hear what sounded like squealing coming from my brakes. This is disturbing, because this should not be happening on my car. So, as I do every time something weird happens, I take it to the dealership. Now luckily for me, my dealership is only 1/2 mile from work, else this would be really damn annoying. It becomes more annoying for them since they get to take me to work, and call me, and pick me up when it's raining to come get my car. And so yesterday they did just that. And it turns out that my front brakes were bad. Now, I am not cruel to my car. I love my car. I don't take it to track days with our BMW club, I don't take it to autocrosses, I just drive less than 10K miles a year. And the front brakes needed to be replaced! So, moral of the story...while I love my BMW dearly, so far I've cost them a lot of money. 4 new tires, brand new brake pads, 2 new sets of wipers, 4 oil changes, a brake fluid flush, 3 gallons of windshield wiper fluid, and two door lock actuators and 4 fuses, all in the course of 20 months. Yup, this free maintenance plan works great!

Damn, already?

2008-10-20T09:14:00.004-04:00

Last night it happened for the first time. My car showed the dreaded snowflake. On my car, when the temp hits 37 or lower, I get a chime and a snowflake. Last night it popped up while I was making a banzai run for cinnamon. Yes, cinnamon. Hard to make an apple pie when you have no cinnamon in the house. I could have sworn we had cinnamon, but it's seemingly gone AWOL. Therefore, trip to the market instead of the Jets game. Luckily, it's not that far away, but on the way home...snowflake! I audibly yelled, "NOOOOOOOOOooooo...." As I was only one in the car, I don't think the car cared. But I did. The end is near. SNOWFLAKE!

Cruel cruel world...

2008-10-08T10:20:00.002-04:00

My reward for my vacation? Being buried alive in work. One of my fellow associates thought that perhaps they needed time off too and took off the week after me, leaving me with not only all the work of mine that had sat around, but theirs too. After having a meeting with my boss in which I was given more work than 3 associates should have, let alone me, I blew my stack. I brought up the fact that everytime I go away, all my work is left to fester and sit, but when anyone else takes time off I'm expected to do all my work plus all of theirs. The response? That's the way it is. In other words, get used to it, you're a slave around here. I promptly came down with a head cold, which due to the situation in the office, I can't take any time off for. Not that I have sick time anyway, since I was roundly chastised the first and only time I took a day off sick, and have been forced to work through stomach flu and other ailments that even a minimum wage worker would be allowed to go home for. I know I should blog more, but it's depressing and now with the country going to hell in a handbasket, I may be stuck here in perpetuity. Yeah.

So that's what happened while I was away?

2008-09-30T10:40:00.003-04:00

So I took a week's vacation for the first time since April. I will suffer for doing this. Not only is my car in the shop getting door actuators repaired, but it seems that my work was put in some sort of perpetual loop while I was away and absolutely nothing was done with anything. So now I'm buried alive in work. Now when anyone else goes out on a vacation I'm expected to do all their work plus my own and not complain. When I do it? My work can be ignored.

I also had an interview yesterday for a firm that I interviewed for back in July. To say that was awkward doesn't begin to describe the 20 minutes I spent. All the standard questions were already answered, the other person in the room had not seen my resume prior to me handing it over the desk, and had absolutely no idea who I was or why I was there. How many times do I have to say, "I have no experience doing litigation" before it sinks in? I'm not going to lie about it...I don't have experience doing litigation. This is not to say I can't learn it, but it's not like I'm going to wake up one morning with the knowledge to do detailed litigation magically in my brain. Kicker? Upon further research by me after the interview, the person who interviewed me has only been there a year, was admitted the same time I was, and I'm going to be considered junior? Yeah, the offer is probably not forthcoming on this one.

Hope arises anew....

2008-09-15T16:17:00.002-04:00

I took the radical step of getting myself a career counselor. I see it almost like work therapy. I have tasks to do to make myself accountable for my career quest, and each week we meet to discuss what needs to be done and what has happened. For the first time in a long time, I actually feel hopeful about finding a firm/office that fits who I am. I want a career, not just a job. That's why I went to law school in the first place. This has just been a 2 year detour methinks...I'm eager to get back on the highway.

Back to the grind...

2008-09-10T12:48:00.003-04:00

The trip was great. We got to see the ocean, eat lots of good food, spend a couple blissful days at a B&B, and even got to visit a new winery. Of course, before I even made it back home I received a call from work and was told I _had_ to come in early to put out fires that my boss couldn't or rather wouldn't handle. So I sucked it up and came in early, only to have my boss not show up for another 45 minutes. Was it necessary to come in early? No. Was it something that couldn't be handled when I normally arrived? No. Was it worth ruining the very last dregs of my three days off? HELL NO.

Happy Anniversary Honey!

2008-09-05T23:32:00.003-04:00

After a day off that found me sitting in a cemetery on a beautiful sunny day celebrating and memorializing the gift of my grandfather to an anatomical gift program, we are packing tonight for a trip to celebrate and memorialize our 10th wedding anniversary. To think that tonight 10 years ago I was sweating details and hoping tomorrow would go without a hitch, I will spend tomorrow with my spouse and think back to that perfect day in September where we got all dressed up and looked better than we had ever looked before in our lives, and have the pictures to prove it. It was a great day that our families talk about even today as picture perfect and one hell of a party. To think that in a blink 10 years slipped by is just slightly unbelievable. It seems that it was only yesterday. May the next 10 or 20 be just as glorious. Happy 10th Anniversary Dear!

Meltdown...

2008-09-03T12:37:00.003-04:00

I'm having a meltdown today at work. I've taken abuse for doing my job in an efficient manner, taken abuse for asking a question, I've had to beg people to do their jobs today, and gotten blindsided on other tasks. I feel like I'm going to throw up, want to just sob, and get the joy of having all this happen without my boss not being in the office yet. When the boss shows up, it's going to get worse. I think lunchtime requires a trip home to just cry in the peace and quiet of my living room.

Happy Labor Day!

2008-09-01T11:09:00.002-04:00

It's a three-day weekend! Sadly, our friends in Louisiana aren't enjoying the same weather we're having. Here's hoping the levees hold this time. We've been lazing about here, went to a fair yesterday and ate baked potatoes and funnel cakes. Mmmm...funnel cakes. Anything is better than work, and a three-day weekend is what has gotten me through the last 2 weeks. This is a busy week coming up, with my in-laws dropping by to visit, a memorial service for my grandfather at the end of the week, and 3 days of work to contend with in the meantime. Also, trying to do some research on Cape Cod, as we're taking a trip at the end of week for our anniversary. Never been there, so it's a blank slate for us. In the meantime, kick back, relax, and enjoy a bonus day off.

The View Never Changes

2008-08-22T12:20:00.002-04:00

Fast forward 12 hours, and I'm doing the same thing, even though the secretary is working today. Because why would you have a secretary make changes when you can make the associate do it? Occasionally I'm told to "try my hand at something" only to have the paragraph excised in total on the next round of edits. I wasn't even allowed to sit down this morning at my desk before I started taking crap from my boss. Now mind you, I've done nothing wrong here. Unless of course, breathing and merely existing is doing something wrong. Which, by this point of the day I've begun to think may in fact be a problem. How much does it cost to be placed in a medically induced coma?

Secretary Needed...85WPM+

2008-08-21T17:39:00.002-04:00

I sit because I wait. I wait because my boss procrastinates. I wait further because I have ceased to be a lawyer, I'm a secretary. I get to turn my boss's edits to a document that ceased to be anything I wrote 4 hours ago. Literally, there is no sentence in the document that hasn't been rewritten in some fashion. Some of it I understand totally. Some of it is just turn of phrase, which makes me extremely angry. The resulting document is nearly unreadable gobbledygook, all because we need to add 15 million legal gewgaws to make it look lawyerly. Bryan Garner it ain't. Not my idea of a good time either. Since our receptionist/secretary left nearly an hour ago, I get to play phone answerer/secretary until hell freezes over, or until such time I am bid adieu for the evening. I paid 70K for a piece of paper and took the Bar Exam three times for the ability to be a secretary? Yeah, I'm feeling bitter.

Clean Teeth and Hopefully A New Job?

2008-08-18T09:01:00.002-04:00

While watching the Olympics has seemingly taken over every evening of my life of late, I have a week of appointments ahead. I get to go to the dentist, which I hate with a passion, even though I have good teeth. We'll have the whole "We need to take x-rays" talk, and then I'll remind them that they just took x-rays and that it really is not necessary. There's one dentist in the office who is desperate to do cosmetic work on me, even though my teeth are perfectly fine and not the least bit crooked. It's a necessary evil I know, though I'd love to tell them that sending out those postcards with my appointment on them is against HIPAA rules. Where's the "Personal and Confidential" hmm?

Later this week I have a lunch appointment with a career coach. After getting dinged thoroughly by 4 firms in the course of a month, I need to regroup and see what's going on. There's someone locally who works with people to effectively market them to get new jobs. I'll see if it does me any good to sign up. I'd go back through the law school for assistance, but I'm not convinced that'd do me any good. I wasn't exactly top 10% of my class, so they look at me funny. Either way, it's good to get a second opinion.

Just Come Out and Say You Don't Trust Me

2008-08-08T15:59:00.002-04:00

Yesterday was a decent day at work. No boss, but things were completed anyway. I was given authorization to go ahead and actually do something with authority for those 8 hours the boss wasn't present. It's amazing what the lack of bureaucracy will do for productivity. And it went smoothly without any hiccups. Today? I was just informed I need to provide a copy of every and all documents that I authorized yesterday. Why? No reason given. I say, it should have been just a slap in the face...it would have hurt less and been more upfront. I've gotten three reminders today alone to do things I have been doing all along. Why? Because my boss won't read my emails, just reacts. I've just about had it. Damn good thing it's Friday.

Wow, has it been that long?

2008-08-03T20:31:00.004-04:00

It's nearly Monday again...and that is truly depressing. A weekend with no golf makes Beanie grouchy. The summer is short enough as it is without weather screwing things up. On the job front, 2 of the 3 interviews have not panned out, but I still hold a candle for the third. And weirder still, I got a random email from a firm from some distance away who wanted to talk to me about a position. It's a real firm, and a real job, so I'll be doing a phone interview this week. Not a clue how they got the resume though. It's rather odd.

On the home front, we're thinking about doing something with the landscaping around the house. As we have spent all our energies focused on the interior, the exterior has suffered greatly. We do not possess outdoor rehab skills like our indoor ones, so we're looking to hire this one out. We've had one person stop by so far, and he gave us some ideas and will give us a quote later on this week. We've already taken one of his suggestions and begun taking down a defunct chain link fence. Fun with ratchets and sockets...and dodging bees which also liked the fence. I guess we should watch more landscaping shows now.

Good Luck All!

2008-07-28T17:37:00.002-04:00

I'm sure many of the people are already in transit, holed up in hotels across this great country counting the hours to the beginning of the end. And so it begins, this bi-yearly ritual of lawyer hazing known as the Bar Exam. I've had more than my fair share of experiences with the event, and know that there's nothing that can be done now. Pack your quiet snacks, your earplugs, your highlighters, pens, and pencils in your Ziploc bag. Sleep well. You know what needs to be done, and gosh darn it, it can be done. I'm living proof. See you on the other side.

And we're holding....

2008-07-22T14:46:00.002-04:00

I got curious yesterday and lobbed a couple phone calls into the firms where I interviewed earlier this month. The first firm seemed pleased that I called, and hasn't yet finished their interviewing process. I was told that I was not being ignored and that I should call back in two weeks if I haven't heard anything further. The second firm, the one that was all gung-ho about getting this whole new hire thing over quick...yeah, they didn't return my phone call. So either they hired and I'll see a ding letter sometime this millenia, or they're rethinking the whole new hire thing. Either way, not good. The third, I know they're still interviewing and I won't bug them for a while. In the meantime, I'll go about my work, hoping desperately that things change soon, and trying not to get chewed out. Maybe I need to take a wee vacation day or two.

For those of you who are up next on the Bar Exam pinwheel of fate, hold on kiddies...the fun ride is nearly at its end.

Who's Interviewing Who?

2008-07-17T12:46:00.003-04:00

Interesting thing happened on Wednesday. I went in to an interview for a job I wasn't sure I wanted, and actually came out feeling better about the job and the organization when I was done. That hasn't happened before. Perhaps it was being relaxed and trying to be myself that did it, perhaps it was a lack of pressure on my end. It had its fair share of odd questions, and a fair share of odd answers on my part, but how many group interviews have you had where you actually got the interviewers to laugh? I did, more than once. In a way, it was sort of a surreal experience. We'll see if it goes anywhere, but even if it doesn't, it was a fun afternoon.

And to bring me screaming back to reality, upon my actually trying to do work this morning, my boss thought it'd be a good idea to totally change the file structure on the server. Documents I needed, I couldn't find. Documents I opened, I couldn't save. And my boss couldn't understand why I got upset about this. Could it be that you're doing it in the middle of a business day? That you might actually be impinging on my attempts to do something billable? And what exactly do you bill to "sitting on my ass waiting for the boss to figure out how to make the files prettier?"

How Long In This Holding Pattern?

2008-07-15T12:12:00.002-04:00

I haven't heard a word on anything about the interviews, and I also lined up another interview for Wednesday. Surprisingly, it was for an organization I interviewed with back before I passed the Bar, and had a pretty awful interview experience. I'm older, wiser, and licensed now. It should be an interesting round 2, and for a bigger better job. In the meantime, I feel like I'm in limbo. I can't organize any days off, any trips, or even CLEs, because I might be out of here right quick. And hearing horror stories about how the prior employees left, I'm not counting on two weeks notice. Seeing as how I don't do litigation anyway, my projects aren't exactly long term and require a lot of turnover hand-holding. One week should be enough, but rude, I'm sure. Thoughts?

Changing the Rules of the Universe

2008-07-09T17:10:00.002-04:00

There are certain things while studying for the Bar Exam that give a sense of calm once you learn them. I can't remember many of them now, but one that always made sense to me was Adverse Possession. It had to be hostile, lasting and continuous (time frame of 10 years), open and notorious. So what does New York State do 3 weeks before the Bar Exam this year? Change the rules to Adverse Possession. I about jumped out of my skin last night when I read that. You can't screw with the universe like that and not expect consequences. It can't be just a fence any more, or having mowed the lawn for 10 years, it's got to be a serious and important improvement. And of course, not being lawyers the journalists who covered this story gave the time period short shrift, so I was digging all over today trying to find if the time period changed. It didn't.

Now I don't mean to freak out the people studying for the Bar Exam, because by this point the exam questions have been written and printed, so it's not that big of a deal, but wow...going and messing with Adverse Possession just leaves me discomfited...and I'm not even a Real Estate attorney.

.2 - Called Boss Everything In The Book

2008-07-08T12:41:00.003-04:00

Ah, a holiday weekend does a mind good. Tried not to dwell on Monday, and was somewhat successful. Also got in a round of golf, cleaned the carpets, and watched a highly illegal but very entertaining fireworks display put on by our neighbors.

We all came back to work greeted with the message that we now have to bill and account for every moment we're in the office. Yeah, not too thrilled with that prospect. For instance, what code do you bill for looking for a new job? Or staring out the window? What are we, three? It's bad enough I'm being told now when I should be taking a lunch as to not impinge on other people, but now I have to account for the moments I have alone in the bathroom. And to think, I don't even work in BigLaw!

So here's to the two interviews I had, including probably the shortest one I've ever had with 2 people during my lunch hour yesterday. Good opportunity, and great learning possibilities. I've got no problem with being succinct. So now I have to sit on pins and needles and wait for something to happen. And figure out what to bill this blog post to...

Just a few hours more!

2008-07-03T15:41:00.004-04:00

This week has been hellish. I've been forced to pick up all sorts of work because of someone's vacation, which I would never fault one for, but was given no warning about the possible consequences. Issues came up, that had I known about would have been able to handle with some forethought and ease, but as a result was caused to scramble and made missteps that could have been avoided. And to top it off, my work computer decided to go all weird this morning, which still has not been repaired. This is not for lack of trying mind you, but I refuse to have to beg my office manager a third time to do their job and see about getting IT on the phone. I can work around the problem, albeit clunkily, but I foresee no result to this issue, since it's seen as really no big deal. I'm only a lawyer after all, what use would I have for a computer that is actually able to open pdf files?

But hey, it's a 3-day weekend...if I can just get the hell out of here.

Can You Tell Me About Yourself?

2008-06-30T09:13:00.002-04:00

Indeed, the job search is still on for me. In fact, I have an interview tomorrow, and an interview next week. This is causing me to freak out slightly since the last interview I had, which went swimmingly well, did not in fact get me the job. I also have to fudge my schedule at work on those days in order to step out for the meetings. Luckily, they're near where I work now so travel time really doesn't figure into the situation too much. As it is that no one locally does what I do, I have to play up the fact that I have all sorts of skills and would be more than happy to use them in whatever role the new firm saw fit. I also have to do that without seeming totally desperate. Though, since I have a job right now, how desperate could I be, right? So think happy thoughts, and maybe this will all work out. In the meantime, it's a 4-day workweek...it's a 4-day workweek.

Woo woo!

2008-06-25T14:22:00.002-04:00

Like most people I've gotten a speeding ticket. I've only gotten one in my driving career *knock on wood*, but for me that's one too many. Recently we had the opportunity to get a radar detector at a really reduced rate as a result of a raffle. It tells me all sorts of weird things, since it reads 3 radar bands plus lasers. I do not take it with me when I go to work as my commute is quite short. However, I almost needed it this morning. Right outside my office, a local cop was running a speed trap in the middle of a 4-lane road. Sitting in the middle turning lane, causing a total hazard...all in the name of safety? What the hell? I've seen multiple people pulled over near the office, and I am so tempted to just hang out my shingle and handle traffic tickets here. Easy money, all one police department. Part of my lawyer brain wants to know if that sort of speed trap tactic is legal...but then again, there's a personal driveway they sit in as well, and that is just plain trespassing. Can you tell I'm bored?

Here a Resume, there a Resume...

2008-06-18T11:22:00.002-04:00

I've put some emphasis on my job search of late. I know it's a horrible time of year to be trying to find a new job, with all the new graduates, but unlike all you newbies, I have real-life legal experience. Yeah, yeah, stop laughing already. So I lob resumes hither and thither with the hope of a nibble. I've gotten a couple calls, done one interview, but nothing ever comes of it. It's depressing honestly. I guess I shouldn't complain too vociferously, since I actually have a job that pays me to come to work everyday, but fulfilling it isn't. It's just a means to an end. I tried to tap some of that unfulfillment in my newest cover letter sent today, and I hope I captured the wistful optimism of someone in the legal community who isn't beaten and cynical. Never mind the fact that I feel like both most days, but I can be wistful and optimistic if pressed.

Yeppers, that's a clean car!

2008-06-12T11:53:00.002-04:00

In the insanity that is my life, I look for things that I can do that make me happy. It's the time of year when our local club car show rolls around. And not only did my spouse and I participate on the committee, we also did judging. I've never judged anything for scores in my life, but it's as good a time to start as any. Turns out, it's very telling what people think is clean on a car. Things that are easy, like vacuuming, seem to go by the wayside. We, on the other hand, are maniacs on the detailing front. Like last year, we decided to go one better and go for the Super Clean category. So not only does the inside and outside of your car need to be clean, so does the trunk and engine compartment. This is a bit of a challenge, especially since I've been parking at work in what is effectively a construction zone. Sand has been everywhere. However, we sucked it up and cleaned like fiends for 2 days. And our reward? 1st Place Trophy in our category. It cheered me immensely. Knowing the competition, I'm still stunned. But now I have two trophies for my car. I never got a trophy for anything before this car. I like the hardware.

Let's do nothing, shall we?

2008-06-06T12:59:00.002-04:00

Because we can't have a week without Beanie getting in trouble somehow, I bring you my latest tale of woe. Seems I don't bill enough. Now this isn't exactly a shocker, seeing as how my work goes something like this: (1) get project, (2) complete my portion of the project in a reasonable period of time, but insanely quickly by this firm's standard, (3) hand it in for review, (4) wait weeks or months for a response. I brought this up when I was told I don't bill enough. That didn't seem to matter, since the purpose of the meeting was getting me to admit that half the time I sit on my butt. As this is not a prevarication, I agreed. It's hard to do something when all your work is sitting on someone else's desk waiting for their portion of the work. It's particularly ironic for that same person to get on my case for not doing anything. The response to this issue? Don't try and fix why I'm not doing anything, give me lots of busy work that isn't billable to anyone. So now I have an arm's length list of "busy" work that won't serve any purpose other than to make me "busy". Yep, really makes me want to come to work.

I Will The Phone To Ring!

2008-06-02T11:44:00.002-04:00

Nothing new here, same old crap, new week. I'm moody as all get out, and it's all related to work. I had an interview 2 weeks ago, and haven't heard a word. I even called to follow-up, and got nowhere. So that has impacted my mood as it looks like another opportunity has bitten the dust. I'm angry at home, I'm angry at work. I got all this extra work last week since one of the other associates was out on vacation, and I thought I was just keeping the fires burning until they got back. This morning's meeting? Yeah, they're mine now. Gee thanks. I'm getting chewed at for things I have no idea about, because I never had the promised meeting on the project. And gee, the one project that has been sat on for 5 months is now a priority. Not my fault you sat on it for 5 months. I've been harping on this project nearly every week for each of those 5 months and was duly ignored. The word of the day is procrastination...no wait, that is every day's word here.

At least it's Tuesday...

2008-05-27T09:34:00.003-04:00

I'm back at work after a long 4-day weekend. We traveled this weekend to visit friends of ours a few states away. We got stuck in construction, cussed about the quality of the roads, had a close call with some tools falling off the back of a firetruck, and had a great time. I still haven't lost my fear of driving, so it makes for some interesting experiences when we switch drivers. I freak out over weird things. My spouse does a good job talking me down when I start to get that way. We came back last night to a ratty looking lawn, unpacked the car and went to bed. While I would have liked a day to recover, at least it's Tuesday already.

Taken to the cleaners? Yes please!

2008-05-23T11:28:00.005-04:00

I was forced into a lunch meeting at work yesterday. Since we now have a conference room at work, we have these mandatory weekly meetings where someone at the firm has to present something of note. Nothing I enjoy more than eating with people who rather not have anything to do with me. This week's presentation was about websites. Now mind you, I've been on the internet since 92. I've been through PINE, Lynx, Mosaic, old VAX systems, MUDs, MOOs, MUSHes, the dot-com boom, bust and YouTube. I've been blogging for years. What did I learn from this presentation that was taken from a seminar that a secretary and clerk attended? It'll cost us at least $25,000 to start up a firm webpage. It'll cost at least $200 a month for maintenance. That you need to pay extra to track the metrics of your site. You have no idea how hard it was for me to keep from laughing. Our firm needs a front page, maybe some bios. Ever heard of SiteMeter? $25K? I should submit a quote. Come in for a 1/5 of this imaginary number and code something that'll work just fine. But yeah, no one thinks I can do anything. And as far as blogging? It was discussed as some sort of nebulous thing that no one is sure how to do, and that will need far more research before there are conclusions. I bit my tongue until it nearly bled and ate my food. This firm deserves what it gets.

Yeah, what's it to you?

2008-05-19T10:48:00.004-04:00

This week is going about as good as last week went. The office is like a seething pit, and everyone is afraid when the boss will go off again. The daily meetings we have (which are inconsequential at best) have become openly hostile toward me. To the point that other employees are questioning what I've done to brought this on myself. My answer, "I show up everyday." I feel like a punching bag most days. It's now most definitely effecting my home life. I'm subdued, angry, and quick to bite everyone's head off. I am physically ill before I go to work in the mornings, and leave work each day with a stress headache. I have resumes out, but it may not be enough. I may not survive this.

What the F&*^!

2008-05-13T11:26:00.003-04:00

We moved offices. And of course the new space was not exactly in move-in condition. Working in a work zone is always fun. The offices were covered in dust and whatnot, random people wandered in and out, and we tried to work. I proceeded to develop stomach flu by the second day and worked like a dog on Friday, only because I was stupid enough not to call in. I begged to go home halfway through the day, but was given such a friggin line about getting work done before the end of the day that I stayed. I'm a moron. Never mind the fact that the work that "had to be done" wasn't my own, but the clerk's who doesn't work on Friday. So yes, I'm below a secretary, I'm a clerk's helper. Yeah, a clerk's helper who works without food for fear of throwing up on the furniture.

I spent most of the weekend sleeping, or trying not to be ill. Monday arose with me having to explain to the clerk why I had to do the work on Friday. When I continued to be needled by this clerk, I finally cut the conversation short by explaining that I did not feel it necessary to explain myself to a clerk as to why I was doing my job. The clerk then went to the boss and blew me in. I was then called into the bosses' office and berated soundly for 15 minutes for bruising the ego of the clerk. The whole situation was so insane that at one point I actually chuckled. That made things worse. I could have really given a crap at that point, and nearly walked out of the office in mid-rant.

I have not been fired, because you know when you have indentured servant status it's hard to fire the scut worker. However, my attitude has gone much worse now. I barely speak to anyone, and while I serve my clients well, I do nothing for anyone here. There are no favors, there are no niceties. Because damn it, if you want to treat me like I'm something to be hated, I'll give you something to hate. Obviously punctual, diligent, and skillful gets you nowhere here.

Moving Schmooving

2008-05-06T11:19:00.002-04:00

Our firm is moving. Not far, but far enough to put the place into a status of discombobulation. As a result, things are up for grabs. Namely furniture pieces that aren't making the move. I had reviewed the possibility over the weekend, and had decided on two pieces. I made arrangements to collect them when it was necessary to do so. I now have neither of the two pieces. Why? I've been usurped by a clerk and a secretary. Why? Because they want them. No other reason. Now I have no idea how they're getting them out of the office in a timely manner, but that's not my problem. All I know is being a lawyer here means bubkes. I could get really indignant and pull an end-run, but I'm not going to. I'm better than that. I will however remember this, and file it away for later purposes. I have a very long memory. I'm an elephant.

The little details...

2008-05-05T20:24:00.002-04:00

In law school certain cases stick in your head. Some have catchy titles, or something in the case strikes a chord that causes you to remember them. Loving v. Virginia was one of those cases I remember. I remember it because people in our class were absolutely stunned that there was laws against miscegenation. I was not one of those people, having been a History major. The reason for this flashback is that Mildred Loving died Friday. She was 68.

Whew! I'm back!

2008-05-01T12:44:00.002-04:00

Sorry, I've been lax in my posting since the kitchen unveiling, but we took a small vacation to Arizona in the interim. Between work and tearing apart the house, we needed some downtime to recover. And it was a lot of fun. I now know more about cacti than any one not living in the desert should. We took in 3 rounds of golf, which helped to knock off the cobwebs from a long winter, and in the time we were away, we missed a whole bunch of spring. There's a law in our household that if we go away, the weather back home improves immeasurably, and it held on this trip. And the alternative, when we return it goes to crap. That also is true. Arizona is a lovely shade of beige, with lots of highways, and tons of good restaurants in Scottsdale. Not sure I would enjoy the place nearly as much at 110 degrees, but 85-95 is workable.

Kitchen Photos!

2008-04-18T16:14:00.000-04:00

I know many of you wanted to see these pictures, so I had to figure out how best to grab some off the camera and put them up here. The darker cabinets before are above, and the lighter cabinets below are the after. The floor has not been finished yet, nor has the detail work like a toekick, light rail, or a tiled backsplash:

Ah, the sweet smell of silicone

2008-04-17T11:14:00.003-04:00

The countertops are being installed as I type. Sitting at home, doing my job while grinders grind away. A little loud, but better than being at work. I still haven't been fired. In fact, I have a vacation coming next week. About damn time if you ask me. One of these days I was gonna snap and get myself fired. Things stay the same at work, but my frustration with it keeps growing. And now with this home project nearing an end, I won't be able to get my ya-yas by drilling holes and sanding walls. I need to take up martial arts or something. I need to vent my anger constructively. Else, I'll end up with an ulcer, and to what end? In the meantime, I bring you new countertops, wonky plumbing, and broken drill bits.

Ah, spring is in the air!

2008-04-08T13:39:00.002-04:00

The house is nearly back to a semblance of order. All the important appliances work again, and I can actually walk around in the kitchen. Meanwhile, when we were working inside, spring was working outside. Today is a gorgeous day, and it actually feels spring-y out. I drove around with my sunroof open. I even stopped at Starbucks for a green tea frappuccino. I waited patiently while the new barista figured out how to make it. And when the second barista popped out of the back and loudly announced that green tea frappuccinos used to be her favorite until she found out how much fat was in it, I didn't smirk. Not even when she said it loudly a second time. Of course, when the order came to me, the person in the shop who heard all of this, and not the drive-thru, she was sufficiently chastened. I got an apology. And it still didn't harsh my mellow. It's that nice out.

The light at the end of the tunnel isn't a train?

2008-04-03T12:04:00.003-04:00

Nearly all the wall cabinets are up now, and we have an ersatz sink setup (which leaks like a sieve, but hey). The countertop guys are coming next week to do a template, and we'll have real live countertops before we leave on our trip. Saturday is going to be a make or break day, since it'll be the day we make some major decisions on heights of cabinets, cutting holes and bolting stuff to the wall and together. No turning back from that one. Actually, in the scheme of things...this project has been less stressful than the bathroom, in that you can live without a kitchen, but not without a shower. Less plumbing too. It'll be cool. I'll put up a full picture book when I'm done, just to prove that it indeed did happen and to record it for posterity.

This is not my beautiful house...

2008-03-31T09:01:00.002-04:00

The kitchen is no more. As of Saturday afternoon we have no working sink, the microwave and stove are disconnected, and we have about 2 feet of workable space. There are holes in the walls, dust everywhere, and the silverware drawer is living in our bedroom. We still took time out of our hectic lives to go to IKEA for the second time to pick up missing pieces, swap the pieces that were injured in some way, and eat more meatballs. We should be all set now. And, bonus in the AS-IS department, we were able to pick up the wood necessary to fix our pantry closet to make it look like our cabinets, all for a whopping $5. We felt quite proud. Still, it wasn't fun to come home last night from the trip and realize the house is still a war zone and we did nothing yesterday. But, today is a new day...and even though we're currently at work, we'll work tonight and hopefully get some wiring and sheetrock up. It'll get done...someday.

I thought we had a living room around here....

2008-03-28T10:11:00.002-04:00

The construction is going along swimmingly. Every night we come home and put together a couple more cabinets. In fact, we're down to one last cabinet to build. The goal is to make sure we have all our parts accounted for by Sunday, since we're returning to IKEA to swap bad pieces, get missing parts, and return the stuff we didn't need. Cool thing we learned while doing this is that you can share parts among cabinets, so we ended up with stuff to return after all. In the meantime, giving some thought to what we would do with our old cabinets, we put them up on Craigslist. Oh my goodness! I had no idea our local Craigslist was such a powerful thing. Within 10 minutes of posting the cabinets must go for free (and mind you they're old and grubby), we had no less than 4 requests. That has since grown to about 30 responses. People are desperate for these cabinets. Of course, not all of them are available yet, since they're still attached to the wall and holding our plates and food. As far as our attitude toward each other, we're in good shape...though walking around the house is troublesome. Of course when we start tearing about the kitchen in earnest we may come to blows, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Just kidding honey!

Home Sweet Home

2008-03-25T09:00:00.003-04:00

The kitchen remodeling is well underway. We already have built 6 cabinets, hung 2 of them, and have nearly finished one wall of the kitchen. Funny part is, regardless of how crappy work is, getting home and doing this makes me feel so much better. It feels important and worthwhile. Not to mention, we've already put quite a dent in the pile of boxes downstairs. Can't get too complicated for our meals though, since the kitchen is a war zone. Easter Sunday was pizza. And good pizza too. Anything that can be reheated quickly works for us. Last night, leftover meatloaf. And we haven't even started the demo on the important cabinets yet. I'm not worried, but it's going to get a lot messier before it's over.

Job? Really?

2008-03-20T11:09:00.003-04:00

I had the opportunity to interview this morning. Nice firm, great opportunity, but I don't have the litigation experience I think they're looking for. I've never really had the opportunity to do litigation, even as a paralegal, so I can't really lie about it. At least I wasn't requested to provide a transcript. I hate when that happens. Anyway, I have a question for those of you out there who work in larger firms. Is 2,000 hours billable do-able? I realize there are people who have no problems with working 12 hours days, 6 days a week, but this isn't exactly a firm that would have struck me for such a high requirement. I'm not sure if I can do that. Never mind that I have no idea what the pay is, so that may make the decision for me, but I just want to have an idea what it's all about. Will I ever play golf again? Will I ever be able to go home? It may be all a moot point anyway, but I just wanted to know.

Kitchen? Did someone say Kitchen?

2008-03-18T12:37:00.003-04:00

Like many people across the nation, we're holding on to our house for a while and waiting for the housing cycle to play itself out. We're also trying to improve what we've got so when the time is right, we'll have a great house to show. To that end, we've recently redone the bathroom, and now are working on the kitchen. Being bold pioneering sorts, we're doing it ourselves. And to do our cabinets, we picked IKEA. I love IKEA. I love IKEA even after spending 10 hours there on Saturday. Why 10 hours? Why not 10 hours? It took some time to place the order, we had lunch, more shopping, picked up the order and had to check to make sure our order was complete, and most importantly, packing the truck to take it home. And it all made it home. No doors on the highway, no hinges bouncing away on the medians, just a full full full truck. And now it's stacked in our family room. All flatpacked, all just waiting to be assembled. In the meantime, I'll be venetian plastering the kitchen walls. It's oddly relaxing compared to my job. Artistic too. It'll be good. It'll be fine. Just don't ask to eat over at my house at the moment. The kitchen is a bit of a wreck.

Why am I sad about this...

2008-03-12T13:55:00.002-04:00

And so Spitzer has resigned. I heard the news conference, I heard his speech, and I nearly cried. Why? Not because I didn't think he should resign, I did. Maybe because I felt misled. I believed that he was good for New York state, that he would bring his take charge leadership from the AG's office to the Governor's Mansion. I believed he had a good marriage with good kids. My heart breaks for Silda. To find out that while you might be beautiful and intelligent, your husband was paying high-priced call girls for sex is beyond horrible to me. And I don't buy into the whole "it was just prostitution, what's the big deal" argument. He was a lawyer who prosecuted this sort of thing. He used to get the warrants for the wiretaps, and investigated the money trails. Was his ego that big that he thought he could sneak by because he knew how the game was played? But I'm not even that angry. No, I'm just sad about the whole thing, because I keep thinking about what could have been. I wish David Paterson the best of luck for what lies ahead. I hope he can bring honor and integrity back to the Capitol.

From Famine to Feast...

2008-03-07T12:54:00.003-05:00

I have large amounts of time where I just sit at work and do nothing. This is not by choice, but rather due to the inability of my boss to let me do anything on my own. I'm held hostage by waiting for the next crisis/job/task to be given to me. Everything has to be vetted, and this takes time. So, I sit. However, the paralegal in our office went on a long vacation this week. As a result, I was given that work as well...because you know, I'm good with menial tasks. How good? I'm more efficient than I've ever been. Why? No stupid middleman steps. I need something, I don't have to wait for it, I just do it. I cranked out more work yesterday than I have in 3 weeks. And the day went quick. Should I be the one doing this? Probably not, but hey...I'm not a real lawyer, right? The certificate on my wall is a figment of your imagination.

Ah Monday...

2008-03-03T14:53:00.003-05:00

My cold seemingly cleared up over the weekend, which made me very happy. What didn't make me happy was coming into work this morning and finding that my e-mail system (and just mine, no one elses) was hosed beyond recognition. My sent e-mails are have no subject or recipient anymore and bear the same time stamp even though created over a full year. Last Tuesday, I came to work to find our server didn't work. I swear, it's like the place is running on bailing wire and twine. Anyway, I finally got some of my stupid meetings done, but not all of them because that would be too good I suppose. So, what to do now? Plan on tearing my kitchen at home apart. I just don't have enough stress in my life, I need to throw it into total chaos.

I have a code in mah noze...

2008-02-28T16:10:00.002-05:00

I can't breathe out of one nostril. This is extremely annoying, but no more than usual at work. I have to prod the paralegal to do the job they're being paid to do, I keep having my meetings at work rescheduled, and I'm exhausted. It's sad when the the highlight is a cold pill and a cup of chai. And just now, the 3 letters which took me an hour to draft this morning all pretty much got torn up so that they could be re-dictated by the person who requested them in the first place. I swear, I don't know why I work here. Though, I love when I can hand them draft copy of something they previously wrote and have them praise it...and then re-edit it.

Damned if you do...

2008-02-25T10:45:00.003-05:00

I know I whine about my job incessantly. For that I do apologize. I wish things were great, and that I enjoyed what I did everyday, but that is so far from the truth that it pains me to even think that I do this work.

The issue that confounds me currently is this: I'm constantly being held to a standard that is impossible to meet. Since all my work has to be vetted by the managing partner, all emails have to be sent for review first. In response to my emails I'm told that either that it's too friendly a tone, or in the alternative, that I'm being far too harsh. There is no happy medium. The other issue is, regardless of how I write, the edits come back no longer recognizable as my own writing. Nice short concise sentences become these run-on monsters using as many commas as humanly possible. And of course, since I have to send it out under my signature...it looks like I write like this. I would never write a full paragraph-long sentence. One, it's too hard to read, and two, it just looks like a long-winded moron wrote it. I keep getting told that this is going to help me grow as an attorney, but all it's doing is keeping me under the partner's thumb and I'm not learning a damn thing. Oh, and I work too quickly. Not a problem with accuracy mind you...its just that I need to take my time and ponder things. I say it's more that I'm making others in the office look bad. Procrastination may have been a virtue in law school, but I don't abide by procrastination as a creative writing technique. Sitting on a document and reading it 10 more times isn't going to make me change my language choices spontaneously. That's not who I am. I think precisely the first time, which is why it looks like it does. I'm not a creative writer, I'm a lawyer. There's a difference.

How To Get Into A Fight At Macy's

2008-02-19T14:12:00.002-05:00

Hope you all had a lovely weekend. Mine was three days thanks to the federal banking holiday, and I took it upon myself to stimulate the economy by going to the mall. I had a mission to purchase some knives. The spouse and I had tried to purchase these same knives at another mall a couple nights ago, and was told by the cashier in Macy's that she couldn't give me the sale price listed on the sign because it wasn't her department. And seeing as how there wasn't anyone in the Housewares department, which is why I was in Children's, I had her cancel the sale and left. Fast forward to yesterday, where I intrepidly went to another Macy's and attempt to purchase the same knives. Once again, only one person working the register, though this time in Housewares. I waited patiently, and when I got to the register I was told the sale price wasn't being honored. When I asked why I wouldn't get the extra 10% off, I was told because it was in small electrics. Now I wasn't buying an electric knife, I was buying good old steel blades. That line of reasoning got me nowhere. I then retorted that if Macy's wasn't going to honor the price, then they should really take the sign down. I was blown off by the cashier. I once again asked to have the sale canceled. At this point, it was just the integrity of the thing that was keeping me from purchasing, and I was hopping mad. I hoofed it to the Manager's Office, ready to give a piece of my mind (albeit it in a civil manner), only to find absolutely no one there. I could have trashed everyone's offices since they were wide open, but not being in the vandalism frame of mind, I left. I fired off an e-mail to corporate off their website, but I'm not holding out a lot of hope. In the meantime, I'll be shopping elsewhere. I'll probably cancel my Macy's card as well. No need to keep it after all this.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2008-02-14T10:32:00.003-05:00

I know alot of people don't seem to like this holiday, or think it is one of those "Hallmark Holidays." Me, I've always enjoyed it. I enjoyed it when I was in grade school and everyone got a valentine from everyone else in little homemade mailboxes. I enjoyed conversation hearts and Russell Stover heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. And these days I have a valentine, which makes things even better. Though to be honest, we celebrate on the 13th, not the 14th. Not to be contrary, but rather so we can have a nice leisurely dinner without all the crowds. Last night we shared a Love Boat of sushi. Mmmm...eel.

Baby, it's cold outside!

2008-02-11T14:04:00.000-05:00

Like a good chunk of the country currently, it's cold here. I have the gloves and the scarf going on, and with the wood stove at home it's not too awful. I do have a word to the wise though regarding such fashion at times like these. A fur edged hood on your coat is fine. It cuts down on the wind, keeps your ears warm, looks sort of nice depending. However, it's not appropriate to wear this same hood while driving a car. You have no peripheral vision at all, especially if you don't turn your head. And why would you do that anyway, right?

Is February Over Yet?

2008-02-07T14:50:00.000-05:00

Started a new project at work this week, which in itself isn't bad, it's just busy work. I get anywhere from 4-7 new deals a day, and I can review each in about a half an hour unless it's complex. Most of the problem comes in with keeping it all straight in the paperwork. Each of them becomes a little pile, each of them gets a post-it, and they're lined up on my desk in little rows. I keep the details straight, so I get more of the deals than anyone else in the office. Eh, it keeps me off the streets.

Super Bowl!

2008-02-04T10:08:00.000-05:00

We enjoy football. Us, like the majority of television viewers watched the Super Bowl last night. And damn, was that a good game or what! And to think it didn't come down to a field goal at the end was particularly nice. I hate to have it all come down to a kicker. Though, we are a little disappointed that Eli was the MVP...we were pulling for the defensive guys, namely Justin Tuck. Eli wouldn't have had a chance of winning yesterday without the defensive line. And I love that the Giants had guys who had never even been recognized before come out of nowhere to do huge plays. Alford? Who the heck is Alford? Anyway, as much as I'd like to wipe the smirk off of Don Shula's face for the '72 Dolphins, the Giants were awesome. Oh, and one of the commercials I liked best? "I play the oboe." It wasn't clydesdales, Will Ferrell, or the Dell guy being mauled on the street. Though the screaming woodland creatures were funny.

Who Am I, Chopped Liver?

2008-02-01T14:29:00.000-05:00

I like living near my job. I purposely try and reduce my commute, not so much for laudable goals like cutting down on greenhouse gases, but because it saves my sanity. As a result, I'm one of the closest employees to my firm. When the weather goes to crap, I'd rather not be driving in it, regardless of how far away my house is from work. I've said as much. And today, I made an executive decision to be working from home instead of the office so that I wouldn't have to worry about driving conditions. Some of my fellow employees did the same. Who got in trouble? Me. Why? Because I live so much closer. In other words, I should have to risk my car and my neck because I don't have an hour commute. I might have to cover for the receptionist after all. To say I'm angry doesn't even begin to describe it.

Full Circle...

2008-01-29T11:56:00.001-05:00

It's been a while since I posted, but in the interim, the bathroom was finished...and perhaps I may be able to show a lovely before and after shot just so you get the full feeling. I got my teeth cleaned today, see? *grin* And most importantly, my mother and I were able to pick my grandfather up today. For those of you who are frequent readers, my grandfather passed away last year. Like his wife, he too donated his body to science through an anatomical gift program at the medical school. It's been nearly a year, and we were informed via letter that his cremains were ready for pickup. Unlike the last time, where I picked up my grandmother and gave her a tour of the law school, we just went and picked him up and took him home to my mother's house. The box is surprisingly heavy. Not sure exactly what the plan is now that we have both of them, but in the meantime, they're hanging out with Mom. They've both done their year at med school. And come sometime in the late spring, the college has a memorial service at a local cemetery for all those families who gave. It was a very nice service in which all the medical students attend who studied the bodies during 1st year classes. They don't know anyone by name, but they do seem to sincerely appreciate the time they spend with our family members.

Ooooh....walls!

2008-01-23T11:01:00.000-05:00

I was going to write here and say that not much has been going on here. That's not exactly true. While on the work front things are still the same, at home we have shower walls. Yes. This is very exciting. Gone are the days of showering in a plastic drop cloth wonderland. Now, we don't exactly have a shower curtain rod up yet, so we're fudging it with some wood and making due, but having a wall to lean against is a lovely thing. Tonight though, I'm thinking shower curtain rod goodness. We need one. Then the only thing left is the floor. Piece of cake. There's no plumbing involved!

Things that make you go hmm...

2008-01-17T11:39:00.001-05:00

I muddle through the days, though I've been living vicariously through the good news of others. I keep applying for jobs, but I never hear anything. Well, no, I take that back, I heard on a job I applied for last year, getting my ding letter a week after the job had been reposted in the paper. So what does that mean, I can't reapply? Did who you hire flame out and leave? Did you not hire anyone and you lied to me? This has actually popped up twice now. I applied for a job, didn't hear anything, the posting disappeared, I assumed people got hired, and now the job posting is back. What now brown cow?

Still hanging in...

2008-01-14T14:32:00.000-05:00

I'm currently trying to leverage my networking into a new job. How progressive of me, I know. In the meantime I listen to the rest of my office whine openly and don't get involved. Each time I've whined to any one of them, I get the whole "oh, you're blowing things out of proportion" line...so I've stopped talking. They can whine, talk incessantly about old news, I could give a damn, I'm not talking. Call me anti-social, I call it self-preservation.

In better news, our bathroom may actually be completed in my lifetime. We had a brainstorm over the weekend and tried putting up wallboard in preparation to hang the rest of the tub enclosure. It went well. We're still showering in a plastic wrap wonderland, but now we have walls! This brightens my day immensely.

My Car Is Too Smart For Me...

2008-01-10T11:44:00.000-05:00

While I can't seem to control to what's happening to me, I can control my car. To that end, it's been telling me "oil change - 9,000." My mileage is 9,125, so I had made an appointment to get my oil changed. I brought it in this morning only to be told that in fact my car was too smart for me. Seems the 9,000 mile bit meant that it was 9,000 miles to my next oil change. When I bought it told me 15,000. Oh well...guess I just make another appointment next month for a state inspection, yearly service, and then they'll just change my oil because it's a year old. The service writer seemed surprised it only had that many miles on it. Hey, I have a 10K a year lease...I need to be consistent. I bought it mid-February. I'll hit just about 10K at that point. Woo.

I Need A New Job!

2008-01-08T10:03:00.000-05:00

My job made me cry yesterday. After a morning of being berated in front of a law clerk, told not to speak to a client unless given permission to do so by my boss, and otherwise feeling humiliated yet again, I took a lunch at my own house and cried. My end of year review was great. In it, I was told I have a great work ethic, and that coming up this year I should be taking more responsibility for my client projects. In the two attempts to take the lead in my project, I've been slapped down in e-mail by my boss. In neither attempt did I in fact do anything incorrect, but was told that I had not sought permission to do what I did. I'm tired of working like this. You can't have it both ways. The three way call with the law clerk was beyond unprofessional. The clerk may have a hard time looking me in the eye after that beating I took. When I was a paralegal I worked for someone who was unpredictable. From one day to the next I never knew when I would be put in an office and yelled at because I had looked at the partner funny. I thought when I became a lawyer I'd be given a certain level of professionalism. I work in a professional manner, and I expect the same in return. I have the same dread everyday going in to work now as I did as a paralegal. My stomach is a mess, I swear I'm having heart palpitations, and I count the seconds until I go home. I need a new job now. Not later, now.

No Dakar Rally?

2008-01-04T10:32:00.000-05:00

I just read on the news that my favorite road race of the year, the Dakar Rally, has been cancelled due to security issues. Namely, after the killing of four French nationals in Mauritania before Christmas caused the French government to advise against travel to the country. Nine of the stages of the rally pass through Mauritania. More ominous though, there was supposed threats against the race and its competitors by "terrorist organizations." This saddens me greatly. I've posted about it in the past, to the point of making comparisons to life and law school. The last great race on Earth and it gets taken down by terrorism. So much for a New Year.

What's up with this negativity?

2008-01-03T17:09:00.000-05:00

Two days into the work New Year and things are already sucking. Got the first snarky e-mail of the year today which led to a rather uncomfortable argument, been stuck doing a document index all day (why am I doing it...because I've come to believe I'm relied on more for my data entry skills than anything lawyerly I could possibly do). My billables are way up, but my angst meter is already beginning to fill. I have no problem getting a ton of work, but dammit, don't make it work that a trained monkey could do? Is it too much to ask? Never mind the fact that I'm sure clients love getting billed at my rate, when we have staff in the office who could easily do this a hell of a lot cheaper.

Happy New Year!

2008-01-01T17:45:00.000-05:00

We arrived home late last night, home to find a nice pile of snow where our driveway was, causing us to have to break out the snow stuff and do some cleaning up straight away just to get the luggage in the house. It's a stunner to go from 80+ degree weather to freezing and snow, but hey, it's all part of the deal. Made me grateful for the electric blanket. We're kicking back today, getting cleaned up, doing laundry, watching football. I don't have a New Year's resolution in mind for 2008, but have the best of hopes for the new year. Here's hoping the New Year brings all sorts of good things to you and yours.

No Shower? No Problem!

2007-12-24T18:02:00.000-05:00

When faced with a finite deadline on a holiday weekend, do not tear apart your bathroom. Your problems will expand to fill every last bit of the time that you have. Having Saturday, Sunday and Monday before we leave for warmer climes, we tore apart our shower enclosure to replace the tub and surround. We're handy people. We could do this. Of course, this implies that we were given the right parts, could solder joints that wouldn't leak, and bought a RotoZip that in fact had bits included in the box. The good news, the tub is in, not leaking, and effectively does everything a tub should do. The bad news, we have no walls above the tub. Studs and insulation, yes, but no water-tight enclosure. We leave tomorrow. It will not be done. I believe we have in fact written it off. Of course, being our only shower in the house, things may become far dicier before we leave, but hey...it's only a shower, right? In the meantime, I hope you have a lovely holiday, and as many hot showers as you want. You deserve it.

Ah, the holidays...

2007-12-19T11:01:00.000-05:00

We never travel during the holidays unless we absolutely have to. Even then we keep it to car travel, since the idea of fighting endless lines at the airport fighting with surly TSA employees is not a way to bring cheer to our lives. That all changes this year. We decided on a whim to travel on Christmas Day. Vacation is going to be at a premium for me at work for the first couple months, so if we wanted to travel, this was going to be our big chance. Who knew you could get cheap flights on Christmas? Who knew you could get seats at all? Rental cars, not so much, but hotels and flights are great. So now I'm trying to put together a list of things to get done between now and then and to find something to read on the plane. Any fluffy reading you recommend? Or even not so fluffy reading that isn't depressing? The last book I brought on a trip was The Road by Cormac McCarthy. That was without a doubt the most depressing business trip I ever took as a result.

Happy Birthday to me!

2007-12-17T12:25:00.001-05:00

It's that time of year again, the snow is falling, people are shopping, and Beanie is one year older. Is 33 any worse than 32? Probably not. Though the number itself seems to have some heft. The spouse and I have been together for a third of it, and I've lived in my house now for a quarter of it, and it's divisible by 11. It's palindromic! But really, here's to another year of being the best me I can be. And the 104th anniversary of the Wright Brothers' first flight.

Snow Schmow

2007-12-14T10:41:00.001-05:00

Hope you survived your brush with bad weather yesterday. Me, I got stuck at work for a while for no reason whatsoever. I wasn't actually doing anything, but was told I could leave a whole 1/2 hour early. I put my foot down far earlier than that since the only one at risk in that deal was me. My car though was far better in the snow than I could have imagined. In deep snow it wants to float, but in slush and non-fluffy snow, the car is a tank. Takes off from lights with nary a spin. Me, I drive like I'm 90, but I think I need some more confidence behind the wheel. Still, I shouldn't have been out in that crap in the first place. Work from home? What a novel idea! Too bad I'm not allowed. I love being punished for living near my job.

Let Me Check My Calendar...

2007-12-12T09:37:00.000-05:00

It's the time of year when you're pulled in three directions as once. This week alone we have one holiday dinner, one firm dinner, and a holiday party. Throw into the mix work, a possible snowstorm, a bathtub to pick up, a trip to the bank, and I barely have time to eat lunch let alone get ready for any of this. I'd like to get my haircut before XMas, but that's probably going to have to take a pass, since I doubt I can fit it in. And the awkwardness of a firm dinner? It will get us out of work that night at a decent time, but I'm not looking forward to making small talk at a restaurant I'm not terribly keen about. I guess I need to look at it like when I was in law school...free food is free food?

How Big Is It?

2007-12-10T09:32:00.000-05:00

The weekend was a success in that we nearly melted our credit card. You know you're spending money when the fraud department starts calling. Why? We bought a big TV. How big? 60" big. Or as my mother puts it, "Will it melt your retinas?" Yes, I think it will. We had to recruit neighbors to help move the old TV. Because you know, while the new one is 90 pounds, the old one is heavier and even more unwieldly. You walk into the living room now and it's just a giant TV. We may have to move the couch back. My retinas are feeling squishy.

SERENITY NOW!

2007-12-05T10:49:00.000-05:00

The deep breathing isn't working, and I'm seeing spots, so I'm hoping there's something cathartic about blogging.

I have a good memory. Strike that...I have an excellent memory. I remember whole conversations in detail. To commit these amounts of detail to memory require me to pay close attention. I don't normally take notes. To take notes causes me to split my attention and I miss things. I only write down names of people and an occasional number. This drives my boss insane. My boss can't possibly understand how someone can sit across the desk and not write down a word, yet remember all the details of what it was that they just said. There's been words exchanged regarding this. More than twice. I was just told yet again in an email about my shortcomings as an attorney because I don't transcribe conversations between myself and my boss. I had done nothing wrong. We had never discussed one particular detail that I had questioned, and somehow this led to an opening to hammer me for a quirk of personality. Somehow me being able to write down everything that comes out of their mouth will make me a better attorney. How about instead I actually get to practice law instead? I don't think it's too much to ask. I'm tired of being a secretary and taking dictation, thanks.

O Rly?

2007-12-03T09:45:00.000-05:00

The weather sucks, and I had to drive in it. But to make things worse, I have an appointment this afternoon that I have to nonchalantly leave for without causing any to-do. I can't see this happening smoothly. In a perfect world I'd like to take the rest of the afternoon off, but I'm sure that won't happen. So between the parallel parking in my future, trying to slip out to go somewhere, crappy weather, and trying to get the rest of the afternoon off, I'm slightly edgy. And this appointment had better be worthwhile, or the Bean will be Screaming.

Slight Clarification on Yesterday's Post

2007-11-27T11:31:00.000-05:00

After recounting my story at home yesterday evening, it was suggested that I fully explain the situation at the Burger King drive-thru. If you, like me, watched an abnormal amount of football over Thanksgiving weekend, you saw a commercial that involved women in a minivan trying to take out the Burger King guy for making a certain new sandwich. And if you, like me, are extremely susceptible to commercials like this, you will find yourself going to the establishment seeking the sandwich that appeared in the commercial. This is why I went to Burger King yesterday. I wanted whatever the hell that sandwich was. Slight problem. It didn't appear on any signs in the drive-thru, and because I was busy hunting for whatever this sandwich was called, I overshot the speaker. The speaker was before the second menu board, and it too had no sign establishing what the hell it was I had seen on TV. The drive-thru speaker got my attention and caused me to backup, and my consternation regarding the lack of burger signage caused me to forget all about being in reverse. The conversation at the speaker went something like this:

Speaker Guy: Can I help you?
Me: Yeah, I'd like that double melt thing that was on the commercial.
Speaker Guy: *silence*
Me: You know, it comes on bread instead of a roll...you have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?
Speaker Guy: Um, the Honey Melt?
Me: *wondering what the hell he just said as a plane flies overhead* No...y'know what? I'll have an Italian Chicken Sandwich instead.
Speaker Guy: Please drive to the second window.

And that's when I found out I was in reverse and met the woman head on in the drive-thru. So I never did get what I really came there for, and for all I know, it's not even available. So I was snookered by a commercial for a burger that exists only in the imagination of an ad exec. And nearly hit headon by a woman with a deathwish and an inability to read arrows. I don't look nearly so dumb now, do I?

Rain rain go away...

2007-11-26T16:28:00.000-05:00

I hate to drive when it rains. It's not that I don't have confidence in my driving skills, though, in full disclosure I must say that since my accident I drive on wet roads like they're covered in ice. I hate driving in the rain because it seems that rain makes drivers stupid. They lose whatever skill they had and revert to some sort of mindless drone. 60 in a 40? Sure! Tailgate on a hill in the pouring rain? Sure! Change lanes without signaling? Sure! But this one has to top them all. While waiting in the drive-thru line at Burger King today, I overshot the speaker and had to back up. This left me in reverse, which under normal circumstances might have caused an accident (and it would have been fully my fault), but, today the gods were smiling and it actually saved me from a far worse fate. See, when I was told to pull around to the second window and I went backwards instead of forward, I actually dodged someone coming at me in the drive-thru. Yes, the one-lane, curbed drive-thru seemed like just the exit for a woman in a Pathfinder. And from the look on her face when I blew my horn, she saw nothing wrong with what she did. And even luckier for me? The one place where I backed up actually gave her the egress to come around me. Yeah, it's one of those sort of days. And if you see someone in a drive-thru with their backup lights on? Give them a wide berth.

Seven Things About Beanie

2007-11-24T21:03:00.000-05:00

Per Frequent Citations request, I've been asked to post the seven things you didn't know about me. This is rather difficult since I've always been a particularly anonymous blogger, and to give away a number of secrets could be seen as an antithesis to what the Screaming Bean tries to be. Or, I could just be copping out here, so here's seven things I've never mentioned about me before.

1. I cannot snap the fingers on my right hand. Now, I can snap the fingers on my left hand just fine, so when people expect me to snap both my fingers, I'm just faking the right hand part.

2. Neither I nor my spouse has traveled outside North America. Of course now that I have the wherewithal to do so, the dollar has fallen to unforeseen new lows. Damn you Euro!

3. I have no male first cousins. Now that my first cousins have had children of their own, there are boy cousins, but for a long time there, nothing but female cousins.

4. I've never seen a shooting star, but I believe I may have seen a UFO when I was seven years old. My mother can corroborate this sighting. Dennis Kucinich is not nearly as crazy as you think.

5. I broke my nose when I was 8. This is a much harder feat than one would think, since as a child your nose is made of rather rubbery cartilage. Taking a face plant off a playground slide will do that to you.

6. I learned to read when I was 2. Being 2, I don't really remember much of the details. Therefore, teaching another child the technique to read would be a real challenge for me, since phonics just sort of happened. As a result, I can speed read and can take out a standard length paperback in just under 2 hours. Packing reading material for a flight is a pain.

7. And since everyone else put in a food item, I hate pickles. Yes, I hate them with a passion. I will not let them pass my lips. But ironically, I like the taste of pickle relish. Discuss.

As I'm sure Biting Tongue has never met a fruit or vegetable she didn't like, I ceremoniously tag her to give us seven insights to what it's like to be Biting Tongue.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2007-11-21T10:46:00.001-05:00

Thanksgiving has always been a favorite holiday of mine. From when I was small and went to my grandmother's house to eat with 30 of my relatives, to today when it's just 3 of us at our own home, the smell of turkey and stuffing and brown-n-serve rolls just brings back all sorts of good memories. For as much as I whine here, I am thankful for a lot of things...I have a job, a house and a very loving family. I'm truly blessed. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

Take this pen and shove it...

2007-11-19T11:43:00.000-05:00

I have now spent a grand total of nearly 3 hours signing holiday cards. Not for myself mind you, but for the firm. This wasn't my idea. I had no input on the cards. Yet, I was told to sign all 500 of them by hand. Group effort and all that fun stuff. I don't send cards out to my own family most years. Yet, I'm sending to 500 people I've probably never had any contact with. And you wonder why I hate the holidays.

Ahhhh...can I throw up now?

2007-11-14T12:31:00.000-05:00

Seems NY posts their bar results tomorrow. California posts Friday. When I learned this, my pulse quickened even though I have no dog in this fight. That's just the sort of response you get after you've lived through it. It's horrible. So I will cross my fingers and hope for all of you that I know who are suffering right now. It's nearly over. Don't pass out.

What are we, nuts?

2007-11-12T10:16:00.000-05:00

We decided officially to start the home improvement season. When it starts getting cold and we huddle inside for warmth, our thoughts turn to tearing up the house. We have grand plans for both the bathroom and the kitchen, but we can only handle one project at a time. And since we actually do the work ourselves, it involves planning. Can't tear up the tub piecemeal, otherwise we're going to get real stinky. Can't replace the floor unless we tear up the moldings, but we also need to replace the toilet, so there's an order that needs to be followed. Add in a 4-week lead time on some of the parts and there's only some things that can be done now, with the majority done later. So we went and bought stuff, because we're good at that. Sadly though, the new toilet didn't fare so well. The tank is in great shape, but the bowl was seriously busted in the box. So now we need to return our box of shards and try and get a working one. Ah, Bob Vila...where are you when we need you?

Election Day!

2007-11-06T14:10:00.000-05:00

I've always liked election day. It's fun to go and be democratic on occasion and then hope the people you voted for won. I'm not so good in this category. The first election I voted in, every one of the candidates I voted for lost. They weren't some weird third-party candidates either. I found it rather disheartening. And yet, I come back each year and do it again. Not because I feel it's my civic duty so much as it's fun to try and pick a winner. It's like horse racing without betting. Okay, so that doesn't sound that fun. Anyway, to the people who I actually know who are up for election today, good luck. I can't vote for you in my district anyway...but that's okay, sometimes my vote is the kiss of death.

Where's the manual to this thing?

2007-11-05T09:33:00.000-05:00

Time change sucks. It messes with your internal clockiness, and you have to locate and alter each and every time piece that you own that doesn't already alter itself. Wristwatches are easy. Pull the stem, turn turn turn, push in the stem. Alarm clocks...push the button, hold the button, release the button at the right moment. My cell phone does it by itself. My computer too. But my car? For all of it's internal computerization...for all of its thinking when I'm not looking, it doesn't alter the time itself. Which means I need to figure out how to change the time on this sucker. I have no less than 5 manuals for this car. Some are for specific components. Some are cliff notes of other manuals. I'm sure there is some sort of magic handshake or button press to make it all happen, but damned if I know what it is. In the meantime, I'll just be an hour ahead. It'll be okay, I'll just be early.

The Aftermath...

2007-11-01T13:39:00.000-04:00

Halloween was a bit different this year than in years past. First, we had about the half the amount of trick-or-treaters we usually get. This is not because there was bad weather, or even that they didn't turn out like they usually do, but rather because they were too busy attacking each other to get candy. Our neighborhood is ground zero for children/teenagers in our area. Our street corner in particular turns out to be a show in itself. Nothing like two cop cars, 70 kids, and a bullhorn speaker saying "JUST KEEP WALKING!" to enliven an otherwise dull holiday. We inspected the house afterward, and we got away pretty clean, much to our surprise. Had to be rather careful driving to work this morning...I saw no less than 5 shaving cream cans in the street, a number of egg carcasses, and random strewn TP. But I do have a bunch of leftover candy. Who's up for a Junior Mint?

Happy Halloween!

2007-10-31T13:01:00.003-04:00

Here's hoping you have a Happy Halloween and that all the good candy ends up in your bag.

Cold? Damn straight!

2007-10-29T10:41:00.000-04:00

It's the beginning of the end. Last night while traveling back from a lovely dinner out with friends my car dinged. Nothing bad with the car mind you, but a warning that the temperature had dipped to 37 degrees. This prompts my car to flash a warning with a snowflake in a triangle. This made me very sad. Winter is here even if it hasn't snowed yet. My car went bing.